More Accurate Trump Administration Job Titles

MaxiMe: Donald Trump

Toadies-in-Chief: JD Vance, Marco Rubio (NB: In the end, there can be only one)

Secretary of Manly Prancing: Pete Hegseth

Director of National Stupidity: Bill Pulte

Éminence Grise: Stephen Miller

Patient Zero: RFK Jr.

Barely Useful Idiot: Kash Patel

Press Here: Katherine Leavitt

Chief Heddahopperin: Laura Loomer

Not the Wartime Consigliere: Ivanka Trump

Ambassador to the Courts of Lost Causes: Jared Kushner

Cryptonomicanoe and Bagman Too: Elon Musk (ret.)

Vanilla Ice: Markwayne Mullin

4 thoughts on “More Accurate Trump Administration Job Titles

  1. bystander July 15, 2026 / 4:22 pm

    Extraordinary! Love it. I bow in your direction.

    • William Timberman July 15, 2026 / 4:32 pm

      Fun must be had, no? (“They say ‘sing while you slave’ and I just get bored. Oh, I ain’t gonna work on Maggie’s farm no more.”)

  2. Pedinska July 15, 2026 / 4:29 pm

    omg these are great!

    If I may add to the list:

    Secretary of Edufuckation: Linda McMahon

    • William Timberman July 15, 2026 / 4:49 pm

      Oh, yeah! How could I have overlooked that onet? 🙂

      Politics, they tell me, when done properly, is a collective enterprise. As RAI (Raditelevisione Italiana) used to say at the end of every broadcast back in the 60s, “Vi ringraziamo per l’ascolto.” (We thank you for the listening.)

      But even more for the brilliant addition!

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